The Upper Hand Is Better Than the Lower Hand
Every act of charity brings two hands together. One hand is raised in giving; the other is stretched out in receiving. One Friday, standing on the pulpit, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ placed those two hands side by side and ranked them. The sentence he spoke is short enough to memorise in a single breath, yet inside it sits a complete ethic of wealth: give, and train your own soul not to crave and not to beg. Islam honours the hand that bestows, and it also honours the dignity of the poor person who holds back from asking — and in these texts, both honours are taught together, in the same breath.
This article gathers the authentic texts on the two hands exactly as they are recorded. First comes the pulpit narration of Ibn Umar in Sahih al-Bukhari, and beside it — kept separate, as it deserves — the parallel wording of the same narration in Sahih Muslim, because each wording says something the other does not. Then comes the remarkable story of Hakim bin Hizam, the Companion who asked the Prophet ﷺ three times, was given three times, heard one sentence of teaching, and then never accepted anything from anyone for the rest of his life. Finally, the Quran draws the portrait of the deserving poor: people whose need is real but whose restraint is so complete that only a searching giver will ever find them.
1. From the Pulpit: Charity, Restraint, and Two Hands
Ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) tells us that he heard the Messenger of Allah ﷺ while he was on the pulpit, speaking about three connected subjects: charity, abstaining from asking others for financial help, and begging. Then the Prophet ﷺ said:
“The upper hand is better than the lower hand. The upper hand is that of the giver and the lower (hand) is that of the beggar.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1429 — Sahih)
Notice that the sentence explains itself. No one needs to guess which hand is which, because the Prophet ﷺ names them: the upper hand belongs to the giver, and the lower hand belongs to the beggar. The comparison is between two postures towards wealth. One hand is occupied with giving to others; the other is occupied with asking from others. The first is declared better than the second, from the pulpit, in a sermon addressed to the whole community.
Notice, too, the company the sentence keeps. It was not spoken in a lesson about begging alone, nor in a lesson about charity alone. Charity, restraint from asking, and begging were treated together in one sitting, because in real life they belong together. The same wealth that one person gives, another person receives; the health of a community lies in more hands learning to give, and fewer hands being trained to ask. This is the spirit in which the virtues of sadaqah run through the whole of the Sunnah: the giving hand is not merely richer — it is better.
2. The Same Teaching in Muslim’s Wording: Bestowing and Begging
Sahih Muslim records the narration of Abdullah ibn Umar as well, in its own wording. The scene is the same — the Prophet ﷺ on the pulpit, talking about sadaqah and abstention from begging — but the closing words take a different shape:
“The upper hand is better than the lower one, the upper being the one which bestows and the lower one which begs.” (Sahih Muslim 1033 — Sahih)
The two wordings should be read on their own terms, not merged into one. Bukhari’s wording speaks of “the lower hand” and names its owner “the beggar”. Muslim’s wording speaks of “the lower one” and uses verbs instead of titles: the upper is “the one which bestows”, the lower is “the one which begs”. Read together without being blended, they strengthen the same picture. What lifts a hand is the act of bestowing; what lowers it is the act of begging. The teaching is about what a hand is doing, and it leaves every listener with the same quiet question: which of the two acts is my own hand practised in?
Both narrations also agree on the setting, and the setting matters. This was pulpit teaching — public, general, and meant for everyone who heard it, givers and askers alike. It was not whispered to one wealthy man, and it was not aimed at one poor man. It was the Prophet ﷺ forming the instincts of an entire society: a society that gives readily, and asks reluctantly.
3. Hakim bin Hizam: The Man Who Asked Three Times
If the pulpit sentence gives the principle, the story of Hakim bin Hizam shows what the principle did to one man’s life. His story is narrated by Urwa bin Az-Zubair and Sa’id bin Al-Musaiyab, and Hakim himself tells the first part of it. He came to the Prophet ﷺ with a request — and he kept coming:
“(Once) I asked Allah’s Messenger (for something) and he gave it to me. Again I asked and he gave (it to me). Again I asked and he gave (it to me).” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
Three askings, and three givings. The Prophet ﷺ did not refuse Hakim, did not rebuke him, and did not tire of him. The giving hand stayed giving, open and patient, while the asking hand returned again and again. When the correction finally came, it came as teaching rather than as a closed door — a lesson about the nature of wealth itself, spoken to a man whose hand had been filled three times. There is something worth pausing over in that order of events: generosity first, instruction after. The Prophet ﷺ let Hakim feel the full kindness of being given to, and only then taught him why he should stop asking.
4. “This Property Is Like a Sweet Fresh Fruit”
After the third gift, the Prophet ﷺ addressed Hakim by name and gave him the teaching that would govern the rest of his life:
“O Hakim! This property is like a sweet fresh fruit; whoever takes it without greediness, he is blessed in it, and whoever takes it with greediness, he is not blessed in it, and he is like a person who eats but is never satisfied; and the upper (giving) hand is better than the lower (receiving) hand.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
Wealth is pictured as a sweet, fresh fruit: attractive to look at, pleasant to taste, and easy to keep reaching for. The dividing line in the teaching is not between taking and refusing — Hakim had taken three times, with the Prophet’s ﷺ own hand giving. The dividing line is the state of the soul while taking. Whoever takes without greediness is blessed in what he takes. Whoever takes with greediness is not blessed in it, and his condition is drawn in one unforgettable image: he is like a person who eats but is never satisfied. Greed turns a full portion into an empty feeling; the hand closes on the gift, and the heart is already reaching for the next one.
Then the pulpit sentence appears again, this time carrying its own explanation inside it — the upper “(giving)” hand against the lower “(receiving)” hand. Spoken now to one man rather than to a congregation, it landed differently. This is the very heart of contentment in Islam: a soul that can receive without craving, and rest without reaching. Hakim heard the sentence once, and he spent the remainder of his life proving that he had understood it.
5. The Vow Hakim Kept Until He Died
Hakim’s answer to the teaching was immediate, and it was an oath. He said to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ:
“By Him (Allah) Who sent you with the Truth, I shall never accept anything from anybody after you, till I leave this world.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
An oath like that is easy to swear in an emotional moment. Hakim’s distinction is that life kept presenting him with honourable chances to break it, and he never did. After the Prophet ﷺ passed away, Abu Bakr — now the caliph — called Hakim to hand him his share of the war booty, the same share the other Companions received:
“Then Abu Bakr (during his caliphate) called Hakim to give him his share from the war booty… he refused to accept anything.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
This was not charity being offered to a poor man; it was his own rightful share, offered by the head of the community. Still he refused. Then Umar, in his caliphate, did the same — and when Hakim refused again, Umar made the refusal a matter of public record, so that no one could ever think Hakim had been passed over or denied his due:
“O Muslims! I would like you to witness that I offered Hakim his share from this booty and he refused to take it.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
The narration closes with a single line that measures the length of the vow:
“So Hakim never took anything from anybody after the Prophet (ﷺ) till he died.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472 — Sahih)
His resolve was his own response to a lesson spoken to him personally, and the narration presents it as exactly that: one man’s gratitude taking the form of lifelong restraint. What the story holds up for everyone else is not the oath itself but the transformation behind it — a man who once came asking three times became a man whom two caliphs could not persuade to take. The lower hand had become, by choice and by discipline, a hand that would not ask again.
6. The Poor Who Do Not Beg Importunately: Quran 2:273
If Hakim’s story shows the dignity of a man who stopped taking, the Quran now shows the other side of the same dignity: the poor whose restraint the giver is commanded to go and find. Allah directs where our charities should preferably go:
لِلْفُقَرَآءِ ٱلَّذِينَ أُحْصِرُوا۟ فِى سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ لَا يَسْتَطِيعُونَ ضَرْبًا فِى ٱلْأَرْضِ يَحْسَبُهُمُ ٱلْجَاهِلُ أَغْنِيَآءَ مِنَ ٱلتَّعَفُّفِ تَعْرِفُهُم بِسِيمَـٰهُمْ لَا يَسْـَٔلُونَ ٱلنَّاسَ إِلْحَافًا ۗ وَمَا تُنفِقُوا۟ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَإِنَّ ٱللَّهَ بِهِۦ عَلِيمٌ
“(Your charities should be preferably meant) for the needy who are confined in the way of Allah, unable to travel in the land.” (Quran 2:273)
These are people whose need is genuine and whose options are cut off: confined in the way of Allah, unable even to travel through the land in search of a living. Yet nothing about them advertises their need. The verse continues:
“An ignorant person takes them as free of need because of their abstinence. You know them by their appearance (from begging). They do not beg people importunately” (Quran 2:273)
Their abstinence is so complete that someone who does not know them assumes they are well off. They are recognised by their appearance — by the quiet marks of people who refrain from begging — and their defining trait is stated plainly: they do not beg people importunately. They do not press, persist, or plead. And the verse ends by turning back to the giver, with a promise that covers every hidden act of spending:
“and whatever good thing you spend, Allah is All-Aware of it.” (Quran 2:273)
Read the verse beside the pulpit sentence and the whole teaching locks together. The upper hand is better — so the believer gives. But the people the Quran puts at the front of the queue are precisely the ones who will never stretch out the lower hand importunately. That means the giving hand cannot simply wait to be asked; it must learn to look. Dignified poverty is quiet poverty, and finding it is part of the giver’s work. This is why the rules of zakat and the habits of regular charity matter so much: they train the eye to seek out need that hides itself, and they promise that what is spent in that hidden way is fully known to Allah.
7. Two Hands, One Community: What These Texts Ask of Us
These texts, placed together, ask something of both hands. Of the giving hand, they ask that it give — for the upper hand is, by the Prophet’s ﷺ own definition, the hand of the giver and the one which bestows. A believer’s ambition is to live on the giving side of the exchange: to be found among those who bestow rather than among those who beg. That ambition is not measured by the size of the gift. A hand becomes “upper” by giving, and the door of giving is open in every circumstance, as the texts on small deeds with great rewards show — the posture matters before the amount.
Of the receiving hand, the texts ask for dignity. Hakim’s lesson stands at the centre: what a person does take, let him take without greediness, for the one who takes without greediness is blessed in it, while greedy taking eats and is never satisfied. And beyond receiving lies the restraint both pulpit narrations praise and the Quran describes: abstention from begging, a soul that does not importunately press people for what they have. The texts draw the picture themselves and we should let them draw it — giving is the higher posture, begging is the lower one, and restrained dignity is honoured on whichever side of the exchange a believer finds himself.
And of the whole community, the texts ask for the meeting of the two dignities: givers who search, and poor who restrain. Hakim refused even his rightful share for the rest of his life; the poor of the verse would not beg even in their confinement. Between such restraint on one side and such generosity on the other, charity stops being a transaction and becomes what the pulpit sentence always intended — a community in which the upper hand is honoured, the lower hand is gently lifted, and no one’s dignity is the price of his bread.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q1. What does “the upper hand is better than the lower hand” mean? The hadith defines its own words. In Bukhari’s wording, “The upper hand is that of the giver and the lower (hand) is that of the beggar” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1429), and in Muslim’s wording the upper is “the one which bestows” and the lower is “the one which begs” (Sahih Muslim 1033). The hand occupied with giving stands above the hand occupied with begging.
Q2. Who was Hakim bin Hizam, and what did he do after hearing this teaching? Hakim bin Hizam was a Companion who asked the Prophet ﷺ for something three times and was given three times, after which the Prophet ﷺ taught him about wealth and the two hands (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472). Hakim then swore that he would never accept anything from anybody after the Prophet ﷺ, and he kept that oath for life — refusing even his rightful share of the booty when Abu Bakr and later Umar offered it to him, until he died without taking anything from anyone.
Q3. What did the Prophet ﷺ teach Hakim about taking wealth? He said: “This property is like a sweet fresh fruit; whoever takes it without greediness, he is blessed in it, and whoever takes it with greediness, he is not blessed in it, and he is like a person who eats but is never satisfied” (Sahih al-Bukhari 1472). Blessing in wealth follows the state of the soul that takes it: contented taking is blessed; greedy taking never satisfies.
Q4. Who are the poor people described in Quran 2:273? They are “the needy who are confined in the way of Allah, unable to travel in the land” — people whose abstinence is so complete that an ignorant person takes them as free of need, who are known by their appearance, and who “do not beg people importunately” (Quran 2:273). The verse directs our charities preferably towards them.
Q5. Does the Quran praise poor people who do not beg? Yes. Quran 2:273 presents the poor who do not beg importunately as the preferred recipients of charity, precisely because of the abstinence that hides their need, and it closes by assuring the giver: “whatever good thing you spend, Allah is All-Aware of it” (Quran 2:273). Their dignity is honoured, and the giver is called to seek them out.