Etiquette of Modesty & Shyness (Al-Haya) in the Quran & Sunnah

1. She came walking with shyness (haya).

Allah says:

فَجَآءَتْهُ إِحْدَىٰهُمَا تَمْشِى عَلَى ٱسْتِحْيَآءٍ قَالَتْ إِنَّ أَبِى يَدْعُوكَ لِيَجْزِيَكَ أَجْرَ مَا سَقَيْتَ لَنَا ۚ فَلَمَّا جَآءَهُۥ وَقَصَّ عَلَيْهِ ٱلْقَصَصَ قَالَ لَا تَخَفْ ۖ نَجَوْتَ مِنَ ٱلْقَوْمِ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ

Then one of the two women came to him, walking bashfully. She said, “My father is calling you, so that he may give you a reward for watering our animals. So when he (Mūsā) came to him (the father of the women) and narrated to him the whole story, the latter said, “Do not fear; you have escaped from the wrongdoing people.” (Surah Al-Qasas 28:25)

The daughter of Shu‘ayb is described in a single phrase that the commentators never stop admiring: she came to Musa walking upon haya — covering her face, her errand pure, her manner guarded. Modesty is praised in the Quran before it is commanded.

2. Draw the outer garment closer — “that is more suitable.”

Allah says:

يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّبِىُّ قُل لِّأَزْوَٰجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَآءِ ٱلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِن جَلَـٰبِيبِهِنَّ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰٓ أَن يُعْرَفْنَ فَلَا يُؤْذَيْنَ ۗ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا

O prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers that they should draw down their shawls over them. That will make it more likely that they are recognized, hence not teased. And Allah is Most-Forgiving, Very-Merciful. (Surah Al-Ahzab 33:59)

The believing women are commanded to draw their wraps around themselves, and the reason is given in the verse itself: that they be known (as chaste and free) and not harmed. Modesty in dress is protection, not restriction.

1. Haya brings nothing but good.

‘Imran ibn Husayn said: The Prophet ﷺ said: “Haya (pious shyness from committing religious indiscretions) does not bring anything except good.”

Lesson: The shyness that holds a person back from sin, from shameless speech and from ugly scenes is never a loss; nothing behind it was worth having.

2. Haya is entirely good.

In Muslim’s narration of the same teaching, a man was advising his brother about haya (as if it were excessive), and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Leave him — haya is entirely good.”

Lesson: Even “too much” modesty is defended by the Prophet ﷺ himself; the world mocks it, revelation honours it whole.

3. From the first prophethood: “If you do not feel ashamed…”

“One of the sayings of the prophets which the people have preserved is: ‘If you do not feel ashamed, then do whatever you like.’”

Lesson: Shame before Allah is the inner policeman of every age; when it dies, nothing else holds the line.