Etiquette of Forgiving & Overlooking (Al-‘Afw) in the Quran & Sunnah
Etiquette of Forgiving & Overlooking (Al-‘Afw) in the Quran & Sunnah
Forgiving people in Islam (al-‘afw wa as-safh): pardon tied to Allah’s own forgiveness, forgiveness as the Prophet’s ﷺ commanded default, and honour promised to the one who pardons, from the Quran and authentic Sunnah.
Part 1: Forgiveness in the Light of the Quran
1. “Let them pardon and overlook — do you not love that Allah should forgive you?”
Allah says:
وَلَا يَأْتَلِ أُو۟لُوا۟ ٱلْفَضْلِ مِنكُمْ وَٱلسَّعَةِ أَن يُؤْتُوٓا۟ أُو۟لِى ٱلْقُرْبَىٰ وَٱلْمَسَـٰكِينَ وَٱلْمُهَـٰجِرِينَ فِى سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ ۖ وَلْيَعْفُوا۟ وَلْيَصْفَحُوٓا۟ ۗ أَلَا تُحِبُّونَ أَن يَغْفِرَ ٱللَّهُ لَكُمْ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ
The men of grace and wealth among you should not swear against giving (their charitable gifts) to the kinsmen and the poor and to those who have migrated in the way of Allah, and they should forgive and forego. Do you not like that Allah forgives you? Allah is Most-Forgiving, Very-Merciful. (Surah An-Nur 24:22)
The verse descended in the hardest personal test of Abu Bakr’s life — slander against his own daughter — and its argument is one question: the forgiveness you hope for is given to the forgiving.
2. The recompense of evil is its like — but whoever pardons and reconciles…
Allah says:
وَجَزَٰٓؤُا۟ سَيِّئَةٍ سَيِّئَةٌ مِّثْلُهَا ۖ فَمَنْ عَفَا وَأَصْلَحَ فَأَجْرُهُۥ عَلَى ٱللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّهُۥ لَا يُحِبُّ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ
The recompense of evil is evil like it. Then the one who forgives and opts for compromise has his reward undertaken by Allah. Surely, He does not like the unjust. (Surah Ash-Shura 42:40)
Justice is permitted in full measure; then the verse lifts the eye higher: the one who pardons and sets things right has his reward upon Allah Himself.
3. “Hold to forgiveness, and enjoin what is right.”
Allah says:
خُذِ ٱلْعَفْوَ وَأْمُرْ بِٱلْعُرْفِ وَأَعْرِضْ عَنِ ٱلْجَـٰهِلِينَ
(O Prophet,) take forgiveness (as your habit), enjoin virtue, and ignore the ignorant. (Surah Al-A'raf 7:199)
The Prophet ﷺ is commanded to make forgiveness his default dealing with people — taking from them what they can give of character, and turning away from the ignorant.
4. …and who pardon people — and Allah loves the doers of good.
Allah says:
ٱلَّذِينَ يُنفِقُونَ فِى ٱلسَّرَّآءِ وَٱلضَّرَّآءِ وَٱلْكَـٰظِمِينَ ٱلْغَيْظَ وَٱلْعَافِينَ عَنِ ٱلنَّاسِ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ يُحِبُّ ٱلْمُحْسِنِينَ
-the ones who spend (for Allah’s sake) in prosperity and adversity, and those who control anger and forgive people. And Allah loves those who are good in their deeds, (Surah Aal-e-Imran 3:134)
Pardoning people is counted among the marks of the God-fearing, in the same breath as spending in hardship and restraining anger.
Part 2: Pardoning in the Sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ
1. Forgiveness only increases a servant in honour.
“Charity does not decrease wealth; and Allah does not increase a servant who pardons others except in honour; and no one humbles himself for Allah except that Allah raises him.”
Lesson: The world calls swallowing a wrong “weakness”; the Sunnah calls it honour — and promises its increase from Allah.
Adab No. 67 — all evidences for this entry, taken from the DeenHub Global library. Open any link to read the original hadith or ayah in full.
- Part 1, Point 1: Surah An-Nur (24), Ayah 22
- Part 1, Point 2: Surah Ash-Shura (42), Ayah 40
- Part 1, Point 3: Surah Al-A'raf (7), Ayah 199
- Part 1, Point 4: Surah Aal-e-Imran (3), Ayah 134
- Part 2, Point 1: Sahih Muslim 2588 (Sahih) and Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2029 (Sahih (Darussalam))